A funeral

Last week I attended a funeral.  The 30 year old son of a dear friend was hit by a car while riding his bicycle, and died after 10 days in a coma.  I haven't been to a lot of funerals, but at my age, I suppose that will be gradually changing in future years.


There were a few points that struck me.  Of course, there is grief, and that is quite a dominant theme.  The one who died was young, and it was shocking for his parents and his brothers and sisters.  He was unmarried, so at least the grief wasn't further compounded by his leaving behind a widow and children.


The funeral was Christian, so it was generally positive for a funeral, expressive of the hope and faith that the deceased will continue with an even more fulfilling life on the other side.  Most funerals here are Buddhist, and I have not attended one of those, although I would be interested to do so sometime.  At this funeral, some friends of the family provided very beautiful music and sang meaningful hymns and "songs of Heaven".


I found a particular part of  the funeral to be quite moving and, I think, helpful.  There were many flowers set behind the casket, and at the end of the funeral, the attendants took the lid off of the casket, and brought it toward the center aisle.  Then they started cutting the flowers, and handed them to the guests, friends of the deceased.  The guests took the flowers, and tucked them into the casket all around the one who had passed on.  It seemed to be a hands-on way of saying a final goodbye, very final, but sweet and loving.


Here in this country, cremation is required.  The family goes to the crematorium, and after the cremation they will take the bones of the one who has passed on and put them into the urn.  I haven't been through that yet, but it must cause quite some thought and reflection about the issues of life and death.  Generally, that seems good to me, as those are some important issues that all too often we tend to ignore.